English Blog

Well, I love you but not like that. March 25, 2010

Filed under: Gender & Sexuality,Middlesex — writing4english @ 11:02 AM

I have to disagree with the idea that Desdemona and Lefty really wanted to be together but couldn’t because they knew it was wrong. I think that the attraction between Desdemona and Lefty was a burden on them; a burden they enjoyed but were reluctant to explore. Before Desdemona’s mother passed away her last words to her daughter were, “Take care of Lefty. Promise me. Find him a wife!” From then on, Desdemona was left with a large responsibility at such a young age. Thankfully, she was raised to be much more mature. Although it was a crazy transaction for her I think Desdemona enjoyed her responsibilities. She loved her silkworms & the cocoons and her brother, Lefty, very much. I think she was led to act more like a mother figure for him. “Didn’t she do everything for him, cook, sew, and keep the house as their mother used to?”(Eugenides, 27). That right there makes me believe that the only reason they ended up together was because she wanted the best for her brother and she wanted to keep her end of the promise she shared with her mother.

Lefty knew it was time for him to settle down but he couldn’t find anyone. He knew his sister was there to look out for him and he wanted to make her proud by picking the perfect lady. Lefty settling down with Desdemona seemed easier and he knew she would obviously approve of herself; she wasn’t a Turk (those are the girls Desdemona was determined to have Lefty stay away from). In regards to the relationship they began to grow, I think Lefty was in it for more of the curiosity. He fantasized so much of other woman and when he would think of his sister he would just pretend it wasn’t his sister.

It was hard for them to have a romantic relationship with each other because well… they were related. When it comes to love we are all told the qualities we should look for in a mate and what we should stay away from. However, we are never told, “Now don’t go marrying your brother/sister.” That just seems to be something we know not to do. Desdemona was even waiting for someone to tell her what she was doing was shameful. But, I don’t think they were reluctant because they knew it was wrong. I think they hesitated because they were confused about the kind of love they actually shared.

Desdemona was very nurturing and wanted to look out for her brother. Lefty was still so curious about life and what it had to offer, but knew it was time for him to find a woman. If anything it seemed like the relationship between them was so easy to happen because they had each other there. They obviously loved each other very much but personally, I wasn’t too convinced with the idea of them wanting to be together in a romantic relationship. I think the commitment between them was made to secure the thought that they will always have each other. It didn’t bother them too much that they were together because they always had each other around and loved each other more than anything. Maybe, it wasn’t until after the dance they shared that they may have seen one another in a different way. The feelings they felt that night made them realize the romance they could potentially share between them.

Nayeli Garza.

*I would like to use some ideas in my final essay. If any of it could possibly work.

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3 Responses to “Well, I love you but not like that.”

  1. I didn’t get a chance to finish reading Book 1 yet and it makes a lot of sense that they ended up together. Wow. I think you did a really good job at analyzing everything.

    Lori E. Allan

  2. While I don’t know if I agree or Disagree with the whole situation, I do disargee with your outlook. I don’t think they were burdened by it at all. Confused, yes. Maybe even a little upset. But you have to remember how upset Desdemona was at the thought of Lefty with someone else, and you have to remember the happiness it gave them both, or the courage Lefty Recieved when Desi agreed that if they survived, they would be married. So I do think they wantd to be together, and while I may or may not agree with their love, I deffinately think it was love.
    AKA Borkowski

  3. Nayeli, you can definitely use some of this if need be. Very nice work here. I didn’t anticipate that the discussion you and AKA B are having here would be the disagreement the class had. Very interesting. [And Lori…don’t admit that!]

    ~Jenna G.


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